(1) Harry Potter And The Blanket Of Ashes

Obsessed

While I was starting to read Harry Potter and Philosopher’s Stone yesterday I remembered something funny, though at the time it was terrifying: I remembered how Harry Potter made me nearly set my house on fire. Looking back, it is a hilarious childhood moment, but believe me, at the time I was terrified. My parents don’t even remember this, I think they blocked out the memory. It was an utterly stupid moment. I can’t stop laughing now even as I try to write this.

So picture this a mini-Claire. I was 11, chubby, didn’t have many friends but I had books and that was OK, that’s all I needed in life. I was living in Barbados and Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone had just come out and my excellent father bought a copy and had mailed it all the way to Barbados! Imagine the shipping costs! Imagine the anxious little bugger I was.

I finally got the copy around 8PM, when my mother came home, and I was mad because I had asked her to stay up an hour past my bed time (yes, at 11 I had a bed time of 8PM. I shudder at the memory) to start the book but she wouldn’t let me. She claimed something about school and my being a grumpy little kid when I didn’t get my allotted 10 hours of sleep. Pah to her logic, I said!

So I proceed to do what any 11-year-old would have done. Well, I’d like to think any 11-year-old would have done this, really. I closed my door as much as possible without it being completely shut (Shut doors were not allowed) and I climbed up onto my too-tall bed (I was dead short, I still am) and I proceed to turn my lamp on. This lamp, was a brilliant lamp. May it rest in peace. It shone bright, way too bright and it produced a good heat in the winter and just made things too hot in the summer. So I gathered up my thin blanket, turn on the lamp and proceeded to stuff it into the lamp. This lamp was also old-fashioned and looked like a light bulb in a rather large bowl. It was right next to my sink (We lived in a British style house so all the rooms had sinks in them, I only ever used mine once and you’ll find out why).

I packed that blanket into that lamp so well! It gave out just enough light to help me read the book but not enough that my mother, down the hall, would suspect my minxy-genius plan. I was so happy! I was a genius! I beat the system, hurrah!

About 100 pages in I started to smell smoke. That was fine and not unusual as I lived next to a bunch of bush that had fires in the summer. Whatever. Then I smelled a lot of smoke, and I couldn’t understand why I was so damn hot. I mean, it was April so it was very hot but not so hot that I should be sweating buckets. So I looked out the window, and everything was nice and black. It was inky, really. After another 50 pages I realised that the light I was using to read was flickering and I looked up.

My bloody blanket was on fire.

So I did what every normal 11-year-old would do, I freaked the hell out. I grabbed the blanket (the fire was located in the center of the lamp) from the sides, ripped it out of the lamp and then did something, that I realise now was utterly stupid: I threw it on the bed. So what happened? My sheets, pillow and mattress started to smolder. The fire wasn’t catching thank goodness but I could cleaaarly smell plastic and cotton burning.

So I then prove my genius in another way: I grabbed the smallest cup I could find and started to fill it up in the sink next to my bed and throw it on my bed, blanket and book. Why’d I grab the smallest cup? Don’t ask me why. There was a bucket right under the sink and somehow, I missed it. After about another 15 minutes of panicking, gasping and running around crying the fire was out. It was still smoldering in a way, but it was out.

Then, I ripped off my sheets, the blanket, everything, stuff it in the kitchen garbage (And people called me smart, you know, well they did before this lol) and I grabbed a quilt and threw it on my bed. Turned off the lamp and went to bed.

My deception was discovered in the morning, as I woke up to find my mother standing quite calmly at the end of my bed with the blankets I had stuffed in the garbage the day before, as well as what was now, a definitely melted lamp.

I didn’t get punished for it but my mother made me sleep on the holey-mattress till we left the country. I got new sheets and a new blanket, and my dad sent me another copy of Harry Potter. I was lucky, I should have been in a lot of trouble, but thankfully my mother and father seemed to understand my attempt at rebellion.

I share the story from time to time, when I get tipsy enough. I go red, I get embarrassed but I laugh because who else can say they have a Harry Potter story like I do?

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I know we’ve all done some cooky stuff, but there has to be someone out there that has done something as foolish as this. Come on. Share. You know you want to!

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Other Harry Potter posts here:

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About Claire (BWB)

It's Claire (aka Quirky) from Bitches With Books, an online book blog that serves up a healthy dose of book reviews, lists + literary madness.
This entry was posted in Discussions, Harry Potter and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

16 Responses to (1) Harry Potter And The Blanket Of Ashes

  1. HA! I’m so glad it didn’t get any worse than a few messed up blankets and a mattress, but that is fantastic!
    My parents were never really strict on bedtimes since I was (and am) a night owl turned insomniac, so I never had to sneak in my reading like so many others. I’m a little sad that I never had to hide under the covers with a flashlight. If my parents saw me reading Harry Potter before bedtime they just accepted the fact that I wasn’t going to listen to them telling me to turn my light off, I guess sometimes it’s best to choose battles you know you’ll win.

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  6. Katy says:

    Omg, I couldn’t help but think you couldn’t be here today if the flames got any further or your mom didn’t wake up. Just the possibilities! But I also have to say the imagery kinda made me smile and chuckle a little. I’m happy you’re still here and blogging about your Harry Potter adventures! 🙂

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  10. Hahaha. Too funny. I had flashlights. There was one in particular that was really slim and small. I think it may have been on a keychain. It only stayed on for as long as I held down the button. But that was fine with me. And MANY times my dad came to the door and said, “I can see the light, Alicia,” or “I know you’re reading in there.” Hahaha. Luckily, he usually just let me be, and often let me read “just one more chapter” before bed.

  11. Heather says:

    Wow. You’re lucky it wasn’t much worse! Haha! (We can laugh at it now, but you must have been SO SCARED as a kid.)

    Don’t feel bad about the 8pm bedtime–my daughter is 12 and her bedtime is 8pm, too. She’s just too tired in the morning for school if she goes to bed any later than that.

    I had an old lamp like that, that would get really hot after it had been on for just a few minutes. One time, when I still played with Barbies (and before I started giving them all brush cuts so they could be more like GI Joe), my sister and I were playing “Hair Salon” with them. We had just washed our Barbies’ hair, and we were getting ready to style them. I decided to put my Barbie “over the dryer,” and decided to use the hot lamp as a hair dryer. The lamp was one of those old, rose-glass lamps with the hole in the top of the glass shade–very convenient for hanging Barbie’s hair into for drying purposes. WELL. I didn’t know that if you I touched the super hot lightbulb with something cold (like Barbie’s wet hair) that the lightbulb would explode…and that’s exactly what happened. As soon as the ends of Barbie’s hair touched the lightbulb, it exploded with a rather loud POP and scared the crap out of me. Hahaha! Thank goodness the thick glass shade contained the exploding lightbulb so no one got cut or otherwise injured. I ran to my dad to tell him what happened and he had to explain the hot/cold-glass-reaction thing. Sheesh.

    • Claire (BWB) says:

      It EXPLODED? Woah, I would have been in tears, that is some seriousness right there. I’m glad you’re dad was cool about it because that’s the most terrifying part of childhood, being afraid you pissed off your parents lol.

  12. Melissa LeGette says:

    Reblogged this on By Candlelight and commented:
    I don’t have anything that compares to this story. Hilarious.

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